Friday, May 2, 2008

Tools for Losing and Self-control

I'm still trying to "lose" weight... still. I know that we talk about doing this for the rest of our life, but sometimes you just wish for a little break in the battle. BUT a break in the battle, so far, has always meant a 5 pound gain. So I am back up 25 pounds -- out of 80 pounds total loss. Not good. If it was a 10 pound "playground" that would be different, but I have let it get way out of hand. that is enough weight to mean a new wardrobe. NO! I refuse.

So, I'm not making a big deal about it, but I had to find SOMETHING that will give me direction. I have eating issues. I cannot trust myself. I am NOT a "thin eater" and have an emotional eating disorder -- stress, pressure, emotions, ... any excuse to indulge. I am experimenting with a "lower carb" version of Weight Watchers. For me, just to add more carbs to my diet wasn't enough structure. I was eating mindlessly. I was eating compulsively. At least Weight Watchers will put some brakes on this out of control appetite. Yeah, it is slow ... but it is ONLY 25 pounds and it is NOT a race.

I have a lot of healing to do. Healing of my metabolism and my attitudes toward foods. I've been doing the old "starve" & "binge" thing. I need structure and routine. WW can provide that.

How long will I do this? As long as I can. I got so tired of eggs, tuna, and chicken. I craved an apple. I was craving foods that I would not allow myself to eat. Now I have a guide. Change is good. Good to know that I am not giving up.

THIS IS THE LONGEST I HAVE EVER KEPT FIGHTING. This is the longest time I have ever not given up. Now that is a great change!

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

What do you do when someone hurts a friend?

Anyone? What can you do?

There are some people "just posting questions" on their own personal blogs ... They say that they are just innocently being curious. In their questions they have deeply hurt a friend of mine. Questions have been worded that could be easily misconstrued as accusations and inuendos. The Questions have been rearranged and reworded and submitted over and over again. Anyone who attempts to answer is accused of "worship" of my friend. Anyone who attempts to offer ANY kind of reply that isn't in line to being "accusatory" is promptly bashed or questioned in a negative way also. And there are comments that make NO sense at all.

It's not right. It's just flat mean. It's hate-filled.

BECAUSE I've seen person after person try to reply to no avail. I've seen person after person post and it just gets more hurtful. Why would someone want to hurt others so much? I have heard that "hurting people" are the ones who hurt people. Well this hurting person has RIPPED another to pieces with "questions".

It was the idea and desire for the 2009 Low Carb Community Cruise to pull the Low Carb Community together for support for each other. The people on the last cruise just really felt a strong connection and we want to share that feeling. Several people have agreed to help me work hard towards that end. We have been trying to get the word out for those that might be able to do it. We've talked about being able to move it around to the different coasts; we've discussed what special surprises and guests. We get a discount on our ticket for making the arrangements - and that is NO secret. We get a discount for working on it in many different ways that include answering questions, hauling supplies & equipment, and keeping up with some of the reservations problems. It appears that there are those who want to rip it up. It appears that there are those who want to take the joy out of it. It appears that there are those who can't stand for someone to have hope and to be blessed. It was SUPPOSED to bring people together, but some people are using it to crush other people.

I just HATE that one of the nicest people I know was slammed for helping me out. I just HATE it that a young woman with big ideas was slashed for trying to push ahead through some pretty tough trials. I just HATE knowing that she is in tears because of people she considered friends.

BUT most of all, I HATE that the source of this is from people we considered to be "one of our own" in the battle against Heidi Diaz.

Who's the next target?

What's in your Toolbox?

I have had some discoveries lately and thought it might help someone else. I am calling this ALL THE TOOLS IN THE TOOL BOX. I started I.F...